My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. I am 26 and he is 27 years old. I have been mentioning I wanna get married and I know he wants to too but I don't know if he wants to right now. But the problem is even after wedding talks and even looking at rings together he still hasn’t popped the question. I don’t know what to do as I feel as if he just will have me waiting forever. Oh and now days every time I mention it he says “babe just wait, it will happen you are just ruining it”. So my question is should I stop talking about it and be happy for my relationship (for your information it has been a year since we have looked at rings) or should I just pull away so he knows what he is missing?
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You’re anxious and it’s understandable because 3 years can seem like a long time. You’re committed to this man, and you’re ready to take the next step on your way to living the American Dream, which for you includes a husband. The only thing missing is a ring to get things moving along in that direction.
First off let me reiterate what I’ve said in other posts: there is very little you can do to “get” him to propose. I gave a not-quite-perfect, but somewhat useful answer in a previous post called, “How do I get my boyfriend to propose?” It may answer some of your questions as well. Clearly you would like to get engaged, but for some reason he isn’t working on the same time line as you are.
Be patient and love him anyway, because if this is “meant to be,” he’ll come around and you’ll be walking down that aisle in no time. (Who knows? You may have a stronger marriage because of it. Discuss that with your parents.) What do I do until then? Until that magical day comes there is something very simple, but very effective you can do to relieve some of your anxiousness:
Realize the good things in your life, more than the not-so-good things. (Yeah I know…it sounds like a bunch of new age mumbo jumbo…but it works.) To greater or lessor extent, we all suffer from too much “future-think,” and not enough “what’s good about right now?”
Having dreams and goals is great, maybe even necessary, but don’t forget to enjoy where you are as you move toward them. You have a child, a home, a pending graduation, your parents, most likely your health, and a man to love who appears to love you in return. I’m sure there is more if you sit and think about it so it wouldn’t hurt to make a list that you can refer to every now and again. (Especially when you are feeling extra anxious about the lack of a proposal.)
Happiness is having a dream you cannot let go of and a partner who would never ask you to. ~Robert Brault
So often we miss the good things sitting at our feet because our minds are stuck on a future that seems better than where we are now.
It doesn’t sound like your boyfriend is asking you let go of your dream of getting married to him one day. That should make you a bit happier for now. Go to this helpful website to get all the help you need
